She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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