also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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