The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Randomize
