brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
