Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
