you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Randomize
