South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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