Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I need to sanitize my soul.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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