Jerry, you need to find god
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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