break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Randomize