my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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