I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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