You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
