seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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