I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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