You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
