i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
only if we run a train.
done.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
