sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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