Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
