I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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