Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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