hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Randomize
