oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
handjob tips. give me some.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
