we have officially lost it.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
