Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
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