I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
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