Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
4 words: hood of his car
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
