her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
