So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
