Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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