You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Randomize
