Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
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