Texts From Last Night

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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube

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  (617): I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube http://tfl.nu/ozne
  Replies (13) Good night (3107) Bad night (1318)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth

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  (847): Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth http://tfl.nu/6ed0
  Replies (29) Good night (4431) Bad night (819)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.

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  (407): Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life. http://tfl.nu/q1vp
  Replies (38) Good night (4168) Bad night (668)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.

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  (214): i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night. http://tfl.nu/pbft
  Replies (12) Good night (1040) Bad night (7841)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.

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  (903): Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis. http://tfl.nu/h9w8
  Replies (7) Good night (1996) Bad night (694)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.

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  (604): I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune. http://tfl.nu/081q
  Replies (6) Good night (1094) Bad night (503)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis

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  (508): if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis http://tfl.nu/xw63
  Replies (5) Good night (1889) Bad night (560)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.

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  (+44): I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand. http://tfl.nu/tiko
  Replies (2) Good night (787) Bad night (1276)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.

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  (202): Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table. http://tfl.nu/pg5d
  Replies (2) Good night (1439) Bad night (371)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.

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  (907): I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer. http://tfl.nu/7eiw
  Replies (8) Good night (1219) Bad night (504)
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  (805): View more from California

  You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.

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  (805): You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like. http://tfl.nu/70wr
  Replies (14) Good night (703) Bad night (1181)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out

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  (513): you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out http://tfl.nu/zkkx
  Replies (7) Good night (383) Bad night (909)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.

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  (480): We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us. http://tfl.nu/1i5v
  Replies (5) Good night (757) Bad night (216)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk

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  (248): I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk http://tfl.nu/6hfb
  Replies (1) Good night (441) Bad night (247)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.

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  (904): I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco. http://tfl.nu/2q18
  Replies (2) Good night (580) Bad night (192)

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