Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
