is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
The beers last night were like the tears from god
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
