Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
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