ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
