i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
