I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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