Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
