so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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