their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
