We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
