How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
smell my finger.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
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Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize