do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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