if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
