I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize