Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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