If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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