Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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