The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Randomize
